30 October 2009

In Case of Emergency, Remove Bra

A fitting way to end Breast Cancer awareness if I say so myself.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/chi-talk-bra-maskoct29,0,4631334.story

"No, no honey, I only have mistresses so that we have enough masks for all the kids"

29 October 2009

Just Another Brick in the Wall

Well my friends, here I bring you further evidence of the pussification of society.

I have a few comments on this.
First, life is full of public humiliation. What will she do if her son doesn't make a sports team some day? All his friends will know he tried and failed. What about when he's older and gets fired from a job? The whole company will know. His neighbors and friends too.

Wake up people. Shelter your children from hate. Shelter them from the grotesque images of war. For the love of all that is good, stop trying to shelter them from benign punishment.


Second... its not like the school lined them up facing the wall and gave hard rubber balls to the other kids to bean them from behind with. That might be a bit severe. They simply had to go outside and face a wall where they could hear their friends playing joyfully behind them but unable to participate. I applaud this punishment. It doesn't involve staying afterschool which might cause childcare issues or team practice. Nobody is physically harmed by spankings. No classes missed sitting in the office. Just the loss of some playtime and 15-20 minutes of reflection while you stare at a filthy wall thinking about how you won't want to forget to do that homework assignment.


Finally, this is something the woman can easily rectify. Make sure you fragile child does his freakin homework every night and you will never have to worry about his psychological wellness again. Well, until everyone in the school reads that news article and teases him endless.... but that is totally different.

28 October 2009

Watch Me Pull a Rabbit Out of My Hat


I wonder if they could incorporate this into skeet shooting?

Care and Feeding of Little Ones

There is a very small segment of "civilized" society that is willing to say whatever to try to make a few people laugh. Most of the time, its just other members of this group. I like to think of myself as a member. My eyes water from laugher when I seen the Jesus Christ action figure. I find the "Mostly Garbage" SNL skit brilliant. I'm sure if you troll old blog postings you'd probably find a few choice examples of my own wit.

Today my friends, I showcase another member of the Fraternal order of Dark Humor, Doug Pugh.
I bet this guy gets way more hate mail than I could ever dream of.

Enjoy.

27 October 2009

Random iPod

catch me as i fall
say you're here and it's all over now
speaking to the atmosphere
no one's here and i fall into myself
this truth drives me into madness
i know i can stop the pain if i will it all away

don't turn away
don't give in to the pain
don't try to hide
though they're screaming your name
don't close your eyes
God knows what lies behind them
don't turn out the light
never sleep never die

i'm frightened by what i see
but somehow i know that there's much more to come
immobilized by my fear
and soon to be blinded by tears
i can stop the pain if i will it all away

don't turn away
don't give in to the pain
don't try to hide
though they're screaming your name
don't close your eyes
God knows what lies behind them
don't turn out the light
never sleep never die

fallen angels at my feet
whispered voices at my ear
death before my eyes
lying next to me i fear
she beckons me shall i give in
upon my end shall i begin
forsaking all i've fallen for i rise to meet the end

26 October 2009

Saving Second Base

Just because Breast Cancer Awareness month is winding down, doesn't mean support and awareness should stop.

http://www.nbcam.org/


http://ww5.komen.org/


This was my purchase this year to help the cause.
I help because I have a wife and two daughters.

Also because I have two sons who I would hate to see deprived.

23 October 2009

Lips and Asses

I don't care much for hot dogs, but I have a sudden craving for a salad.
PETA protests National Hot Dog Day

20 October 2009

Dual Dialing

There's stupid... and then there's this.

Personally, I like how he tried to justify it by saying he still had one finger on the steering wheel.